If He'd Said Goodbye
by PKNight
Summary: Ficlet. Jess says goodbye before going back to New York. Simple, really.


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Title: If He'd Said Goodbye

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Summary: Just my idea of what it might have been like if he'd said good-bye to Rory before leaving for New York.

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Rating: G

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Spoilers: Uh, if you don't know where this is from, what are you doing reading the fanfic? But…spoilers for Teach Me Tonight.

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Disclaimers: I own nothing. Please don't sue me. It's not worth it.

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A/N: Okay. This is a ficlet, the first I've ever completed and am satisfied with. Might be a little out of character, but…I call's 'em as I see's 'em.

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If He'd Said Goodbye

Rory had buried herself in a book, as was usual. She didn't want to think about what had happened that night. It was too horrible. And she knew something was wrong with mom and Luke, because she hadn't said anything about coffee or anything that could remind her of the diner. They'd avoided talking about what had happened. Not that it helped.

Rory sighed and flopped onto her back. She held the cast up so she could study it. She'd been fascinated by her mom's cast when she'd broken her leg, and had wished that she could have one. "I guess I should have been more specific," Rory said to herself.

She jumped, nearly squeaked when someone tapped on her window. She rolled onto her stomach and looked towards the window to see Jess standing there.

Wordlessly, she went over and opened the window, then leaned on the sill, waiting for him to talk. Their breath misted in the chilly air.

"You okay?" he asked her, not taking his eyes off her cast. He looked so…worried, she realized. When you got past the exterior, he felt things deeply. He just didn't like to show it. "I mean, I heard you were walking and everything, but…you know."

"Yeah, I do know," Rory said. "And I'm fine. It's just a hairline fracture. It doesn't even hurt that much." *But that's because I'm wacky on painkillers,* she amended to herself.

"It will once the pills wear off," Jess told her. "I did that once, myself. Hurt like nothin' else." Rory smiled slightly at the echo to her own thoughts.

"So…" she said, trying to lead him to speak. She looked around, and saw a duffel bag at his feet. "What is that!" she demanded, pointing at the bag.

"My stuff," he said, falling back to only stating the obvious.

"Don't give me that," Rory snapped. "Why do you have all your stuff with you?"

"It's not all my stuff. Some of my stuff is still at Luke's. It would be really hard to haul around all my stuff, especially with my book collection."

"Jess."

"I'm gonna need this stuff."

"You're not running away?"

"Nope. I'm riding away. I've got a bus ticket back to New York."

Rory stared at him. "What?"

"I'm going back to New York," he said, looking down at his boots.

"But…I thought things were going okay. I mean…"

"That was before tonight. Before my little joyride."

"It was not your fault."

"I was driving."

"You know, you sound like my mother."

Jess raised his eyebrow. "Shocker. She's blaming me. Well, for once I don't blame her for it. I blame me, too."

"Jess," Rory sighed. She was about to say more when he interrupted.

"Look, Rory," Jess said. "I blame myself. I did what I could to make it better: I called the ambulance, I talked to the police. Then I left you at the hospital before your mom could find me and turn me into ground beef. Now I'm doing what I should've done quite a while ago."

"Run away," she said. He looked at her stonily. "Don't give me that stoic façade. You're not a stoic. You're running away because you're scared. I don't know what of, besides my mother, but you're scared of something."

"I'm scared of hurting you again." Jess mumbled the words, but she heard them anyway.

"What?" she demanded. "Jess, you didn't hurt me in the first place. The car hurt me, the animal that ran out in the road hurt me, and the dashboard hurt me! But you didn't! Did you throw me against the dashboard? No. It wasn't your fault!"

"I was driving: it's my fault," Jess said stubbornly. "And I'm leaving before I can do it again. I've probably already destroyed your relationship with Bag Boy, I don't want to do so with your mother, or anyone else."

"Why are you telling me this? It seems more your style to just leave. Why didn't you?"

Jess refused to look at her. "You're my friend," he said to the ground, as if that said it all. Maybe it did.

"You're my friend, too. You will at least write me, right? Or call, or something?"

Jess smiled thinly. "Yeah. I will." He looked up at her, and she could tell he was lying. "Good bye, Rory."

She sighed, then leaned further out. She motioned him closer, and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Good bye, Jess," she whispered. Their eyes locked for a long moment, and she thought he was going to kiss her. It should have shamed her that she wanted him to kiss her; she had a boyfriend. But…she did want him to kiss her.

Without another word, he turned and hefted his duffel bag. He began walking away, and she just watched him go, tears pooling in her eyes.


End file.
